And Then He Said

I am not happy. I cut my tongue crunching a boiled sweet earler today. It's bleeding again. I'm going to bed for a while.

So. The office move has happened and I'm trying to get used to a new existance in a goldfish bowl. But, as the fact I'm posting would suggest, at least I've got a good position in the bowl (hiding behind a bit of weed and a knobbly bit of ornamental coral). I've no idea what…

No words are needed when a picture replaces 1,000…

I don't believe in conspiracy theories. I don't think the FBI murdered Kennedy, or that aliens kidnap cows, or that TV newsreaders can look out of their screens and see us. So I am totally calm about the fact that when I just went into the kitchen to make cheese on toast, and finally exorcise…

Cheese update: none left today either. Mrs Cheese is in our office right now, she's never come in before… she's making strange noises with Sellotape just out of my line of vision but hasn't said a word to us. I can can almost smell the cheddar on her guilty breath and see the crumbs of…

I feel really grim this morning – like I've just finished working a full day, instead just being about to start one. Partly tiredness (although I got six hours sleep – that's loads for me), partly the humidity, partly I just feel like a slobbish wreck at the moment. Mrs Cheese (see yesterday) had been…